One year!!

Emmett turns one year old today.

One year ago today, my life was filled with more happiness than I have ever felt.  When my baby was thrown up onto my chest, I became a mom, something I wanted for quite some time.  I went from saying funny things while I was in labor, such as “Why would anyone put themselves through this twice??!” to the happiest Ethan has ever seen me.  For the record, it took 2 minutes for me to say that I would totally do it again.  Apparently mom-nesia set in quick for me!  The next few hours were filled with holding Emmett and smiling so much that I thought I would not be able to have other facial expressions.  I understand when people say that the day their child was born was the best day of their life.  The extreme joy I felt is enough for me to say the same thing.

My little thumb sucker

While “time flies” feels correct, it also doesn’t.  I’ve watched Emmett go from a small, stationary, needy 7 pounder to a big, mobile, needy 23 pounder.  I’ve seen him lift his head up higher and higher, smile, move around on his belly, pet Libby, “read” books, chew on toys, suck his thumb, go up on all 4s, sit up by himself, make first sounds, laugh at Ethan tickling him, crawl, pull to stand, “talk”, take first steps, watched how his little brain is developing different skills.  I’ve gotten to enjoy this whole first year at home, with him almost every hour he’s been awake.  I’ve put Emmett down for almost every nap and almost every bedtime.

I’ve had times, usually just in ordinary moments, where I just stare at Emmett and am overwhelmed by how much love I have for him.  One of my friends was talking about how we aren't even adopted into God's family, but God wanted us and made us...I could only think about my desire to be a mom and the years I waited for it.  How I now have this beautiful son who I wanted for so long, who now says "Mama" and holds out his arms to me.  How we have this relationship with Abba Father.  How often I only have "Abba, Father, I love you, Daddy" to say.  The pure love that comes from a baby, with no language to express himself, just "Mama" and his beautiful smile.  Holy crap.  Sometimes it feels too much to handle.

I will not say that I have enjoyed every moment, as babies can’t fully communicate (in english) what they want and I don’t always have an answer for those weird times.  At the end of every day, though, I have been so thankful that I got to be with and experience it all with him.  I’m so thankful that God takes care of us financially so that my staying home with Emmett is possible.  Thankful to Ethan for being such a great man to work for us, a great husband who is so patient with me and shows love every day, a great father who our son adores and wants to be around.  Thankful for the wonderful, happy son who loves his Mama so much.

I’m so looking forward to continuing watching Emmett grow up, to learn new things, to have new experiences.  This past year has been the best year of my life, and I can only see things getting better.

He does <3 hugs.

Oh!

 

"I'm happiest when I'm with my mom."

I'm Okay, You're Okay

It’s amazing to me all the different parenting decisions.  There is stay-at-home and working, crib and family bed, formula and breast fed, cry or no cry, BabyWise and Attachment, baby wearing and not, demand feeding and scheduled feeding, spanking and not, public school and private school and homeschooling, vaccinating and not, disposable and cloth diapers, schedule and go-with-the-flow.  So many decisions that a parent has to make, all with just one goal in mind: doing what is best for your child.  I believe that since we are trying to do what is best for our child, we let our pride come in and say that our way is the only way.  But from just this small list, one can see that there are many different options for each family.

It’s interesting to me that we can say that each child is unique, but at the same time, believe that there is only one right way to parent.  It seems pretty clear that each decision that can be made, can be different for each child.  Why do we as parents find our way to be far superior than another’s way?  Why don’t we just see a differing view as what it is, someone choosing a different way than our own?  Research, schmesearch.  We are all doing it right, no matter when your kid sleeps through the night, how green you are, if you breastfeed once or for two years.  No one is setting out with the mindset of, “Let’s see if this way screws my kid up!”  Show a little love today for those parents are choosing a different path for their family and keep in mind that they love their kid as much as you love yours.

Desperate review

Desperate: Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe
by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson

I’ve been looking forward to reading this book for a while, since I’ve read so many good things on blogs I read.  I didn’t love the start, but I’m glad that I pushed through.  I enjoyed reading this book.

To be honest, I didn’t love some of the writing from Sarah Mae at the beginning of the book.  She sounded negative and I just didn’t agree.  By the middle of the book, I could understand more of her message and by the end I was looking for more books by her!

This was my first Sally Clarkson book and will for sure not be the last.  I really liked her writing style and she seemed like an experienced, older woman that I would want to be friends with in real life.  She wrote some good truths.  I’m finding that books of this nature are just what I’m needing right now, figuring out life as a stay-at-home mom with a young child.  These women speak about things that go through my head but I can’t fully explain.  It’s always wonderful to not feel like you are the only one dealing with situations, thoughts, and struggles that you are going through.

In each chapter there was a note from Sarah to Sally and one back which was related to the chapter focus.  Sarah started the chapter with her words and Sally finished.  I felt like I was getting prepared for what I was about to read, told experience stories from Sarah and finished with wisdom and experience from Sally.  Great layout.

I recommend this book to moms of any age, especially new moms or ones with many children.

Nanny Dog

Ever since announcing that I was pregnant, people have asked about if I was worried about my dog and my baby.  You see, Libby is a pit bull mix, a misunderstood, but excellent, bully breed dog.  I will admit that before I became involved with the Twin Cities Pet Rescue, I had my reservations about pit bulls.  So much of what I had heard about them was from the news and mostly about dog fighting.  

What a beaut.

My reservations completely dissolved the day I met Libby.  My cousin brought her over to my house (sneaky lady, she is) and once we saw how great she was, told us that she needed to find a new foster family for her so they could get another one.  Ethan was totally in love with Libby, so it was decided, we would take her.  That decision is one of the best we have made.  Libby is such a happy lady, so social and loving.  

I will admit, Libby is the worst guard dog I’ve ever seen.  When someone comes in the door, she goes to greet them with a wiggly butt, a “smile” on her face, and an “I’m so freakin’ excited to see you!” attitude.  Most of the time she will also look around for something to bring to show off, something like a toy, a bone, or a stick.  She brings it so proudly.

Pit bulls used to be nicknamed the “Nanny dog” because they would keep children safe and look after them.  Libby has 100% lived up to this title.  We put Emmett on the floor in our living room (for tummy time, etc) and sometimes we will need to go to another room for something.  Don’t worry, Emmett can’t move too far yet.  When we come back into the room, Libby will be laying next to Emmett on the floor, moving from her comfy dog bed.  She lets Emmett (or other children) pet her, even if it isn’t too gentle.

"I'll look after Emmett, don't worry."

One of my favorite interactions that Libby has had with kids happened in the summer of 2011.  I brought her to one of Ethan’s softball games and there was a 6 year old girl who was very interested in her.  I hadn’t seen Libby with a lot of kids, so I was interested to see what would happen.  This little girl pulled Libby’s hair, tail, and ears.  She even lifted Libby’s upper lip over her nose.  Libby sat there and let this little girl do whatever she wanted, without so much as pulling her head away from the lip-over-the-nose trick.

Am I scared about having a pit bull with my baby?  Heck, no.  Libby is the best dog that Emmett can grow up with, and I can’t wait to see them be best friends.